Members of Stigma Stains following a meeting. Photo provided by Olympia Ascher.
Many people claim that they are completely free of prejudice, when in reality, stereotypes are a set ideas sometimes involuntarily and unconsciously embedded into our minds. Fort Hamilton’s Stigma Stains aims to correct people’s misconceptions one step at a time, particularly by destigmatizing ideas society has deemed acceptable about women.
Club president, Olympia Ascher, founded Stigma Stains with the belief that teenage girls should be able to have a space where they can express themselves freely, and where their cisgender male counterparts can be educated on the many trials women experience in their day-to-day life.
“As per our name, Stigma Stains aims to remove all stigmas society has placed on women through being open with discussing different topics related to their bodies (especially menstruation), their personal lives, and really just their feelings,” explained Ascher.
The club gathered every Thursday, after school to engage in entertaining activities that were both educational and empowering. A memorable activity for the club was discussing the changes to the M&M characters.
The green M&M was taken out of her heeled boots to wear a new pair of supposedly “cool, laid-back sneakers to reflect her effortless confidence,” while the brown M&M now wears block heels instead of her classic stilettos. The brand explained this change by stating that the two characters will now throw “shine and not shade.”
The club felt that this recharacterization sends misogynistic message that women cannot be successful when they embrace their femininity. The idea that a woman should conform to a man’s world to be successful and confident puts a woman’s power on her looks rather than her ability. Stigma Stains discussed this harmful standard to challenge what success looks like in the eyes of society, as well as to contend that a woman’s looks should not dictate her relationships with other women. The brown and green M&Ms can still be friends and successful no matter what they wear.
Following their conversation, the group colored M&Ms that represented themselves. They were able to embrace their individuality and their personalities in whichever way they chose to appear.
The club also participated in an activity where they were taught how to transform ordinary everyday objects into self-defense weapons. This was especially eye-opening to the men in the group who learned about the things a woman takes notice of while doing something as simple as taking a walk. A study shows that one in two women felt unsafe walking alone after dark, compared to one in seven men.
“As a man, Stigma Stains has taught me the importance of really listening and understanding what women have to share,” remarked club member Ayaan Virk.
ABC Trauma Dumping was another activity the club took part in. In a circle, everyone gathered and spoke about their relationships and experiences, their responses cued by the next letter of the alphabet. Ascher also lead a self-love activity involving positive affirmations. This was followed by the participants writing letters to each other about their favorite memories of each other and what they loved most about the person they were writing to. These were only some of the ways Stigma Stains created a safe and welcoming atmosphere.
Most notably, Stigma Stains, in collaboration with Fort’s National Honor Society, lead a feminine hygiene donation drive throughout March, Women’s History Month. They educated students about the cost of feminine hygiene products that, despite being necessities, are very expensive. In doing so, they were able to collect four full boxes of pads, tampons, panty liners, diapers, deodorant, and soap to donate to the Food Bank for New York City’s Women to Women campaign. These products would be packed into kits donated to women to provide them with two months and 100 dollars worth of hygiene products.
Because of its impact, Stigma Stains was awarded the Club of the Month award. It was a particularly special award, as they received it during Women’s History Month, which proves just how much of a change Stigma Stains has made in creating a path forward to educating people and creating empathy around the issues that affect women.
“I look forward to my Thursday afternoons because I know my friends who will show up to room 208 will pour so much support, laughter, and love into our meetings. Everyone who attends and has attended Stigma Stains is really just so caring, and that type of energy fuels my excitement to research and craft interesting topics of discussion each week,” added Ascher. Stigma Stains was not only a place where “mansplaining” was not allowed, but also a place where students were able to connect and celebrate what was once stigmatized. Whether that be through normalizing periods, or learning how to love each other a little more, Stigma Stains provided that comfort.